What are your Goals?

Firstly i weighed in today 1 kg down from Monday. Not much but it's something - i hope i can keep it off given the trip to China next week. Good workout this morning, I'm keeping it down on the weight and the sets for the following reasons. 1. It's mostly food that must be controlled to lose weight 2. Some exercise is what is important, if i hurt myself then i might miss even some. 3. Stress has been the major cause of weight increase in the past few months, therefore i need to reduce the stress caused by working out also. 4. i can build up the weight while concentrating on form.

I'm quite comfortable with the logic above and do feel good from my workout - even though they feel too short and don't push the limits like before. I worry a little that i'm not hitting that 11 in terms of effort in my workouts - with the BFL programme it was always about getting to that extreme and going beyond what felt physically possible - or in his words going with will power alone as strength had been exhausted. i guess i need to build up to that point again. This is to some extent the reason for the subject of this post.

Today while listening to a Podcast in the car i was hit with the question 'What are your Goals?' For some reason this seemed to hit home hard. I could answer quite easily - get down to 80kg by March and be fitter. But is this a good enough answer - i don't think so as it just looks short term and is quite shallow.

So what are my goals? i don't really know, i mean to be fit and healthy (in the context of this blog, obviously there are other life goals but lets keep to the subject). but to develop an action plan and monitor progress then goals need to be specific. define 'healthy' or 'fit', does it just mean healthier and fitter - because this can only ever be true to a point.

I don't have the answers, but I'm going to contemplate this point a lot over the next few weeks, and blog my thoughts in the hope of finalising a plan. for the time being i can focus on the goal at hand - get to 80kg by end of March and then to stay there.

I can then break it up that i need to be below 94 by year end and expect a tough 12 weeks from there to the end game.

Stress

It's been a while, a long while. i think that the subject here has been a topic before but it's been such a big part of my life in the past two months that i need to talk about it. Stress messes you up! Previously i would say that when the body goes into melt down then you know that you are stressing about something, sometimes you can't figure it out until the problem goes away and the pain also disappears - then you have an aha moment and realise what was stressing you out.

Well this time was different - i have been stressed out for over 6 weeks and i clearly knew all the things stressing me out but could only use the means at hand to deal with it without being able to stop the causes. Issues with clients, serious illness at home, lack of sleep, long flights with disabled children, money issues etc.

Methods of coping - lots of alcohol, comfort food, denial etc. the end result was of course putting on a lot of weight and feeling pretty low about myself. What i found interesting was how much this affects me and how it affects my wife differently. I put on weight and she loses weight under stress.

I am out of this period of stress now. I wound down with a weekend of rest and good food. No Alcohol since Friday night and a good workout this morning - also on ESE since lunch yesterday.

I weighed in today at 101.5 KG. while this is a long way from the June low it's only 3.5 kg from my hovering weight over the past three months. Pretty good considering the things I've eaten and the lack of exercise. But quite sad also that now i have to start again and it will be weeks before i get down to where i was! (and just between you and me i'm now obese again which is cause for depression) So, what to do about it.

I'm back doing TT workout. One issue I've had trying to get back into it is that i was hurting myself trying to get back to where i was. Even the hotel room workout proved too much for me. So I've started the TT for fat loss once again but at the Beginner level. What's more I'm doing only two sets and 10 mins interval. next week I'll look to moving up.

You really can't discount the beginner level - i am surprise how hard it was. Now I'm looking forward to moving through the whole programme again.

Diet wise i need to focus. I'm trying to do 2-3 ESE fasts per week. I have conferences, football trips, board meetings and visitors for xmas in the coming months. I really need to be focused otherwise it will all slip again. I've set out a plan which takes me back to end of March which is the beginning of this one year journey. I need to lose an average of 1kg per week to hit my target of 80kg by then. Need to be focused, lose each week and never have a gaining week!

Alcohol will play an important part in this. i will be off it from the new year till i reach goal, but also i need to keep it in check the rest of time.

Wish me luck!

Two Weeks Of Hell

This past two weeks has been the most incredible time of bad news, bad luck and bad experience. Let me put it down here to record it in its horribleness.:

• Started with putting my back out in the gym. After months of squats and dead lifts i could not believe that a rear deltoid raise would pull a muscle in my back.
• Then my oldest sprained his arm playing football at school.
• The winds were good all weekend so even though my back was hurting i went kite surfing - this ended in the need for some serious rescue - a 'fast as you can' 2km swim and then a run to the club to get the rescue boat. Some serious damage to the kite but got most of the gear back and am still alive. So seriously tired though - this lead to coming down with the full flu (not swine though)
• Monday i was so sick but had to meet some important clients. Got back from a very long drive to go to the hospital to see the doctor. as the boy's arm still hurt i took him to the doctor too. I was in no mood to have them x-ray and waste my time and money. Turns out it was broken so that had me looking like a bad parent.
• Then we all got sick, three boys, wife etc.
• A full weekend and some of looking after sick kids and the fun involved in that, just as they were getting better i had to go on a business trip - at last a chance to sleep.
• Two days into my conference i get a call, my second son's care giver had a stroke - she has not insurance, no money and is my total responsibility

Just when you think you have it bad some one or something let's you know that it can always be worse. I've been through three hospitals and had arguments with seven doctors - we are mentally and physically drained. But who are we to complain - we can walk and talk. It is a cruel world.

So, as this is a fitness and weight loss blog I'd better turn this into a fitness and weight loss topic. What has all this meant to my condition? well for the first 10 days i actually lost weight, not working out meant that i was less hungry - that combined with the illness etc.

At the conference i was good, skipped breakfast, had only the healthy snack options at coffee break and restricted what i ate at meals. Everyone commented on how much weight I'd lost - that was good confirmation.

BUT, as soon as the impact of someone you care for being struck down like this i went for comfort food. I had to rush back from Hong Kong to deal with the situation and when straight for Burger King. I want to say that after 6 months of eating healthy it was really hard to eat a Whopper - no wonder the world is fat if that is what we try to put forward as a meal. it was quite sickly but I'm not going to say i didn't like it - just that it was soooo big.

Then after getting home i went for all the comfort foods i could muster. Chocolate, potato chips, plus more crap. The result being that i put back the weight i lost in a very short time.

But Monday i started back the exercise and the diet. I'm off the booze for three weeks, started a new TT program and today I'm having an ESE. Yesterday i weighed in at 98 kg which is only 2 over my lowest of 96. So i think i have a good chance of coming out of this look even better.

Changes in the gym: I've reduced the weight (so that i can build up again) and I'm concentrating on form - for squats I'm trying to get really low which i could not have done before with the high weight (it is amazing how much more heavy things are when you get down). And I'm stretching after each session - putting most of my effort into the glutes and hips as this is sooo tight and needs work.

I will also not do intervals on weight days - i think this is better.

Moving Forward - somehow

I've been pretty bad this month. all the good intentions have been dashed completely with a lack of will power. I have had guests and taken a few business trips this month so that is part of my excuse - but it's only an excuse, the really reason for me being bad is that i have no willpower.

I've been boozing and mixing that with very bad eating. I've missed many fasts and even dropped the interval part of my training workout on most days. Last weekend for example i decided to do no activity at all - just rest.

On the up side i have done a few fasts and I've not missed any resistance training - i have gained some serious strength that i quite proud of. But best of all i seem to have lost some weight!! today i weighed in under 97kg and Monday i checked my body fat which read 27%. might be water or some other fluctuation but i feel that if i can just get through the weekend on track i will be heading in the right direction.

i really want to be below 95 by the time i go to Hong Kong - so the most important thing is to cut down on the wine etc. After all the drinking this week i am happy to have a few days off and eat some healthy food, plus getting some sleep will be a bonus.

Good News

This is a mixed bag here but i feel motivated so that makes it good news. I have been struggling with binge eating, alcohol and general laziness for the past few weeks. Last week in particular i felt that I'd fallen off the wagon and started to gain weight. Today i weighed myself and got 98KG - this is much better than i expected.

There was a fat tester sitting on the bench left out by the trainers so i thought I'd get a reading on that ('cos often we feel that the gain in weight is 'all muscle' but rarely do we check). So the reading was 30.1% (obese) i was a little shocked by the label but if that is what it is then time to push things a little harder.

I had planned to give up drinking and go hard core for the next 5-6 weeks as we have a regional conference in September and i really want to wow the crowd (plus any target is getter than no target). However i am expected to do some travelling and entertaining in the month which will be boring and un-enjoyable if i keep off the drinks - after all i do want to succeed without giving up completely. Yesterday i was a little down as i thought this might make my goal of under 94 by conference difficult to impossible.

But with today's weigh in i am much more confident. Plus while my body fat seems to be much higher than expected i now have more motivation to drop the pounds.

So, now for the August plan. I will try to really stick to this all month - i really want to see good results. here goes:

• Exercise - three days per week TT including intervals, alternating cardio and BW/DB intervals (i really enjoyed these last round), cardio on off days (either in the gym, stairs or back to running with the boss) but not too high intensity as we don't want to over train, golf practise every day in the evening (not super exercise but better than sitting at home watching tv), if i get comfortable with the golf then i can substitute one cardio day for golf at the course. trying to be very active on weekends but also have an afternoon snooze.
• Food - really stick to the Big Mac format, ESE twice a week, alcohol only if in a social environment for work (just friends doesn't count) and never get drunk. Once i get back from my business trip i will do a full two weeks of no-carb, last ten days also before the conference will go no-carb.

I'm off to a good start as this is still the last day of July and I'm fasting - i will keep dinner clean and go for golf practise tonight as well. I want to be clearly under 94kg by the 8th of September - also, to add to this challenge i set the goal of being 26.6% body fat, which at 94 will mean that i've gained a little muscle.

Please anyone reading give me some words of encouragement! i need help in this pursuit, i will post each week to confirm my compliance.

Motivation

i just can't seem to get motivated today. i'm feel depressed, i gained some weight by pigging out on stuff that i haven't had in ages - chocolate and beer etc. I'm feeling fitter and fitter and have had great confidence comments all weekend but still i'm struggling. What's going on?

Can't really be bothered to write this blog but i guessed i needed to at least put down how crappy i feel. My weight was almost back to the 'obese' level this morning. It's hard to work out what is going on, my clothes still fit right so i guess it's a little body composition thing.

this week is dinner and guests all week, it's also the last week of 2K3. I really need to step all of this up. i need to be down below my best weight by September - we have a regional meeting and i want to get some positive comments at least. Anyway it creates a goal.

So, for the four weeks of 2K4 i need to be on top of my diet - this is key. i also need to have something else to do on off days. let me ponder all this during this week so i can hit the ground running for the start.

Hang Over

Never ever think you can end a fast day at the pub! i didn't think i was that drunk but i have woken up today to the worst hangover ever - feel like i might die.

Yesterday was actually quite good. Lower body workout going super heavy and my dumbbell swing, thruster intervals - went 5 sets. Then i fasted for the day, this also went really well and by the end of the day i was feeling great, no hint of the sick feel from the day before.

No workout today, i think this week I'm doing to do the TT workouts only and skip anything else. will be at the beach for the weekend so that will be active enough.